Friday, June 15, 2007

Why? Let me tell you why

If you know anything about me at all, you at least know that I'm a funeral director. You know that no matter how kind or how sensitive I seem, that without death I wouldn't have a "job". Not this job anyway. The thought of this at times really bothers me because I sometimes feel as if I'm benefiting from other peoples miseries, even though I truly feel that what I do is a service to people at a time when they need help. There are times however, when I feel that I could somehow be providing similar services on a different level.

You see, from the outside looking in it must appear as if I want death to occur, resulting of course in the pain it creates. How could I not? This is what I rely on to feed my family. Right? Well yeah, right...but wrong. While I'm not wishing for any death to happen; I guess what I do wish for is that if it should happen in your family that you call me. I wish I were able to do this at absolutely no charge to you or profit to me but I don't know how it's possible.

Just yesterday I was standing at the front door of the funeral home greeting people as they arrived for a funeral. All of a sudden I heard this mournful weeping coming from the room where the immediate family was waiting that I could almost feel in my bones. At that split second I thought to myself "why do I do this?". Why do I subject myself day in and day out to watching and hearing people in pain?

I had no answer for myself at that instant. I know how I got here but I don't know why I have stayed in this industry for the past 20 odd years. Then it slowly started coming back and got me remembering the number of people I have served in that time, thousands of families. People from all walks of life with 3 things in common. They were in pain, they needed me and they called me. When they called on me I was there to give them all that I could.

That's why I do what I do. Pretty simple.

1 comment:

MedStudentWife said...

Exactly DS & hugs to you

Sounds like a "bad hair" day & some pretty soul searching thoughts.

You've said a lot in this blog, much that I have thought and have come to understand what is true to me. I so totally hear you, like you have no idea... your last 3 sentences in this blog especially.

Keep on giving, because this ugly world needs people like you :)